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An empty lot
by Craig Roush
A Kinnopio film writer
The trouble with releasing a seasonal sort of movie on a similarly-themed release date -- say, a haunted house movie
on Halloween weekend -- is that the date in question only comes around once a year.
Jack Frost, a children's film from last December, had its video release postponed
nearly an entire year to coincide with the year's first snowfalls. Whatever benefits it
will reap are surely negated by its long-forgotten nature: few people care, and fewer are
going to spend twenty dollars for the VHS copy. As for House on Haunted Hill, the
William Malone-directed remake of the 1958 classic, it's a bread-and-butter horror movie,
the type of product that audiences lose their taste for when turning their calendars to November.
As a horror movie, Haunted Hill is sandwiched into that uncomfortable genre that always
wants to be known as respectable. Filmmakers have tried to accomplish this by throwing
unnecessary plot gimmicks into their films in an attempt to make them more intelligent,
and so perhaps the most surprising thing about this one is how straightforward it is.
Director Malone (TV's "Tales from the Crypt") and screenwriter Dick Beebe take everything
from start to finish along the shortest possible path -- accounting for both the lack of
confusing subplots and the 95-minute running time.
Of course, there are the usual number of cinematic hiccups, including but not limited to
shallow characters, bad dialogue, unexplained motives, and overblown special effects. At
the top of the list of one-dimensional players is Stephen Price (Geoffrey Rush), a
billionaire theme park tycoon whose latest scheme is tossing a birthday bash for his
wife Evelyn (Famke Janssen) at the infamous House on Haunted Hill. A brief but edgy
prologue sequence informs the audience that this is indeed a spooked residence: at one
time it housed the sadistic Vannacutt Institute, a sanatorium which practiced less than
reputable methods of healing.
For the party, a quintet of down-and-outers are invited: there's Eddie (Taye Diggs), a
former pro baseball player; Sara (Ali Larter), an assistant to a film production VP;
Melissa (Bridgette Wilson), an out-of-work talk show host; Blackburn (Peter Gallagher),
a small-time physician; and Watson Pritchett (Chris Kattan), current owner of the
House on Haunted Hill. Price offers each of these nobodies a chance to earn one
million dollars -- to collect, they have to spend the night in the mansion;
if anyone dies or leaves, his or her share is divided amongst the remaining participants.
Things are going fine until the house's lockdown mechanism is triggered, shutting everyone in.
Soon Price's game is out of his hands, and the movie quickly falls into the standard pattern of
thrills and chills. The characters begin to make excursions into the house's lower levels, each
time narrowly surviving some encounter with the supernatural before retreating upstairs to yell
at each other about it. The basements are cramped, cobwebbed sets splattered with blood and body
parts while the main floor is a twisted art deco motif. But like all haunted houses, this one
seems to have nixed any conventional interior design.
The cast of Haunted Hill is nearly as diverse as the characters they play, and aside from Rush,
none bears any significant screen presence. Thankfully, Rush is over the top in a flamboyant,
cockeyed role that only wears thin near the end; Chris Kattan, star of "Saturday Night Live"'s
A Night at the Roxbury, has a few worthwhile moments as the house's jittery caretaker;
but everyone else is largely unremarkable. Arguably, it's because they don't have much to do
besides stumble stone-facedly through corny lines and run from twisted computer animations.
In some ways, this head-on approach works for director Malone and company. The other haunted
house picture for 1999, The Haunting, wanted to back up its
scares with a dicey back story, but that only made the film more confusing than reasonably
frightening. On the other hand, the lack of substance gives House on Haunted Hill
a gratuitous nature, as if Warner Brothers had some time to kill and some money to spend.
In the end, that's what kills it, and even on Halloween weekend it's hard to find worth in
this movie.
Craig Roush, 1999
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