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 Texas Rangers

Texas Rangers
Director: Steve Miner
Starring: James Van Der Beek, Dylan McDermott, Alfred Molina, Robert Patrick, Randy Travis, Ashton Kutcher, Usher Raymond, Rachael Leigh Cook
Length: 1 hour 32 minutes
Rated: PG-13
Cookie-cutter western
by Michael J. Eiff
A Kinnopio film writer

      The spaghetti western is a classic cookie cutter plot of a time in cinema long forgotten. It appears it hasn't completely gone extinct, though, as Texas Rangers dusts off its contemporary Nike threads for a new look at the West with the same old story. And expectedly, in between every shootout and nineteenth century cliché lies an empty narrative full of first-rate but uninspired television stars.

      Based on the true story of the formation of the Texas Rangers, the state police force in the Lone Star State most recently popularized by Chuck Norris, this adaptation focuses on the young guns of the West. In 1875, Leander McNelly (Dylan McDermott, Three To Tango) reorganizes the Texas Rangers after becoming tired, beaten, and left alone by his wife and children. Bandits have taken control of herds of valuable cattle and people's property in the state of Texas, but before he goes six feet under, McNelly rounds up some eager hands to help, and decides to have one more shot at taking down ringleader John King Fisher (Alfred Molina, Chocolat) and his band of outlaws.

      What may have been an interesting read on hard copy didn't come across very well on film. George Durham, the novel's writer, probably had a story that was best played out in the mind, but making matters worse was the fact that writers Scott Busby and Martin Copeland don't have a lot of experience under their belt. It shows here: they took the story and simply went through the motions.

      For example: Busby and Copeland had a single black character to symbolize the racism that was still predominant in that era. And there were the typical inspirational words spoken by McNelly and Dunnison, which even the tight close-ups that punctuated every dashing eyebrow couldn't prevent from falling flat. Oh yes, and the romantic twist that had more holes than an outlaw on the wrong end of a six-shooter.

      It was a hurried film to say the least, and if the pacing began to lag, or things got too emotional, director Miner (Lake Placid) sped it up with a funny gag or a shootout that left more dead than the body count in Total Recall. Sadly, the classic westerns of yesteryear seem to have done it already, and the stars that gleam on the covers of our magazines don't have what it takes to wear the spurs and ten-gallon hats, or sell us on revenge and justice.

      Accounting for Busby and Copeland's script, the actors were the ones that really had to put the emotion in the already lackluster project. With directing credits on both "Dawson's Creek" and "The Practice," it was no surprise that director Miner was able to put James Van Der Beek and Dylan McDermott on the same screen. With the rest of the cast, including music superstars Randy Travis and Usher, there was obviously a missing element. A performer, no matter what the medium, should be able to captivate an audience to the point where viewers aren't wondering if they left the stove on or not.

      Despite Miner's effort to capture every beautiful landscape of the West and, spice things up with some well-choreographed shootouts, he failed to energize his actors to the point where their words and actions appear genuine. Consequently, every thematic element -- love, hate, revenge, or justice, you name it -- just flowed into the tepid mix of overcooked meat. Sure, the tagline says to "count your bullets," but here's a thought: save your money!

Michael J. Eiff, 2001

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